Postscript to When Too Much Is Really Too Much

On Tuesday June 5th I went back to the ceramics shop to retrieve Crystal's unicorn and my sugar bowl, which were fired and ready to go home. They were beautiful! Crystal's unicorn was shiny and purple with a brown mane and golden horn. My sugar bowl was done in southwest shades of turquoise and orange.

I brought them home and called Crystal to tell her they were at my house. Later that day she and her family came over for a barbecue, along with other family members. I showed Crystal her unicorn and we put it up on a shelf to keep it safe. On Wednesday, June 6th, when Crystal came home from school, I asked her what she wanted to do with the unicorn. "I don't know," she answered.

"Would you like to give it to your teacher, Mrs. H.?"

"Yes!" she said immediately. We found a pretty gift bag to place it in, then Crystal set about making a card. She drew a picture of Mrs. H. on the cover, then told me what she wanted the card to say on the inside:

"Dear Mrs. H.
I hope you like the unicorn that I made for you. You are the best teacher in the whole world."
She signed the card "Love, Crystal" all by herself.

This morning (Thursday) Crystal's mother, Jackie, and Crystal went to school a little early to give the gift to Mrs. H. before the other children got to class. As soon as she saw it, Mrs. H. knew that it was the unicorn Crystal had made the day of the beach field trip, because she had read the story on this very blog! She was very touched and very pleased to receive such a heart-felt gift. It will be a fitting memento of her year as Crystal's Kindergarten teacher. Crystal has learned so much in her class, even though being in a classroom with lots of other children has been very difficult for this home loving, shy-in-groups child.

I am glad she chose to give this gift to her teacher. I think I will Mrs. H. as much as Crystal! And I wish she could see Crystal as I do: this wild, loud, funny, happy-go-lucky child, this shining light, full of beauty and wonder.

Read more of Saralee Sky's articles on parenting in her online newsletter, Nutsense, on her web site: www.babynut.com.

How to Gift Your Children or Grandchildren

I was listening to NPR Weekend Edition Saturday and I heard the saxophonist, Joshua Redman, playing some songs and talking about his father, tenor saxophinist, Dewey Redman. Dewey came to play at a recent recording session with Joshua. When they were done, Dewey asked to play a song on his own, without Joshua. Since it was Joshua's album, it was a strange request. But Joshua said OK and left to get some coffee. When he returneed, his father was done. It only took one take and the name of the song was "GJ".

Joshua and his wife had recently had a baby, and this song was a gift to Dewey's grandson, Jaden. Dewey died shortly after the recording. This beautiful, soulful song will be a lasting legacy to his grandson. Jaden will grow up without knowing his grandfather, but he will have this very special gift, this song, written and performed just for him by this great Jazz musician.

After listening to this report, I started thinking about gifts we give to our children and our grandchildren. We want to be sure they have the best clothes, toys, books, furniture. Maybe one special toy or one special book will remain with them as they grow, but mostly they will grow out of the things we give them, unless we truly give them something of ourselves.

Who are you? What is special about you? What do you love to do? Believe in? Support? What kind of gift can you give to your children or grandchildren that says: "This is me. This is how I feel about you. This is what I want you to remember about me."?

Perhaps it will be a handmade quilt or doll house, a story you write, a picture you paint, a special memento from your own parents you pass on, a camping trip, an afternoon spent fishing, a walk in the woods. Whatever it is, I urge you to think about what you want your children to know about you or your grandchildren to remember about you. Give them gifts that tell them something about who you are, what you know, what you love.

Give them memories in the here and now. Today may be all we ever "have", but our todays are built upon the days that came before.

Read more of Saralee Sky's articles in Nutsense, her online newsletter devoted to parenting and located on her web site: www.babynut.com.